Wow! Where do I begin?
As we are all aware, our dear Michal Ann went home to be with the Lord 8 months ago. She is deeply missed by thousands around the globe who were touched by her passion and compassion. She was the most real Christian I have even known in this life. She is deeply missed by her family of three brothers, 5 sister-in-laws, four children and me, her loving husband.
In the process of focusing on Michal Ann my own personal health issues with non-hodgkins lymphoma cancer, which started around 7 years ago, got pushed to the back burner. For the last two years of Michal Ann’s life, I, and others, had to put all our energy towards her. It required day and night attention, massive prayer, our focus and energy.
It was like, I allowed my issues to temporarily go on pause. I continued to have scans done every three to six months and monitor things – but realistically – we were in a crisis management mode with Michal Ann and it required all our attention. She has passed on into eternity and for her, “Everything is fine!” The reality is, we will only be separated for a short time.
Now for an Update on My Page of Things
Six months ago I had a CT scan and it showed that the two remaining conjoined growths behind my stomach had grown slightly – but only about .1 of an inch. So that was actually pretty good news. The last report showed that they measured 2.1 by 1.1 inch.
But this week I had another CT scan done and I met with my oncologist on Thursday, May 21st to get the report. It is not terrible news – but it is not good news either. The conjoined growths have grown and now measure around 3 by 2 inches. This is a significant change to occur in the past six months. So now I will have a PET scan done on Tuesday, June 9th and meet with the oncologist later that week to find out the current levels of active cancer or any new “hot spots” in my body that might be brewing new activity.
The goal with the oncologist is for me to evaluate things and then have another scan done in 3 months to be able to compare my status. If there is not improvement, and especially if the growths continue to grow, then I will need to go very proactive once again utilizing passive immune therapy (a form of chemotherapy), which I did a few years ago. If I am required to do this again though, I will need to take it to a more aggressive level.
So Where Does This Put Me Now?
Of course, this is not the news that I, or my family, was hoping to hear. It brings a level of disappointment to deal with and another realm of weariness I/we need to face and overcome. It has already been a long journey. But recently I could sense that something was not right and I was sensing that I was going to be facing another round of decisions.
I have already spoken with my Spirit-filled physician and we are both going to be doing some research over the next couple of weeks. Then we will decide my course of action. So over the next three months, I will be re-engaging in some form of alternative treatment as an attempt to find answers and be healed.
I will investigate doing treatments again at the Oasis of Hope or some similar treatment center. At this point in the game, I know I respond well to certain therapies and some I am already convinced are just not for me. I am not a newcomer to this game and at this point I know some of what I will and what I will not accept as treatment.
This also means that we will need to reactivate our Mercy Medical Fund as a part of our EN contributions. Your prayers and financial assistance are needed once again. I will probably need to cancel some scheduled ministry engagements and also raise funds again for alternative treatment that is not covered by insurance. So I have to actively step to the plate and will need the help of others once again.
I Must Get Well!
I am at a point in my journey where I know that I have to get well! Ministry might just have to go on hold for an extended period of time. I might be able to continue on. I do not know yet. But my commitment to God remains unshakeable, and my commitment to my family will be at an all time high. My commitment to health and becoming completed healed remains in a progressive integrated journey of prayer and physical action.
This is not the news I wanted to give to you. It is not the news I wanted to tell my children and it is not the news I wanted to hear. I am a realist and choose not to live in denial. I will live life to the fullest and I will smile at what the future holds. I will trust the Lord with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding. I will continue to believe that God wants me healed and whole and I will settle for nothing less.
So pray with me. Pray for my kids. Pray for this ministry. Ask the Lord for a miracle in Jesus name. While we are praying, I ask that if God lays it on your heart to give and to take a stand with me once again, I would be honored and humbled by your generosity of love, time and money. You my friends are a great blessing to me, my family and the EN team!
Thank you for your love and support. I need you once again.
Prayerfully!
James W. Goll
